Xie Bi An went back, faced the wall and thought about his mistake. He spent the rest of the night chanting a mind-easing recitation to the wall.
Fan Wu She's "sudden attack" made the nightmare he had no
longer the biggest problem at the moment. After all, it was more urgent and
problematic to worry about his present life than about what he had done in his
past life.
He felt that Fan Wu She's abnormality was all because of him. Because he had not noticed that he had taken the book by mistake, and had made Fan Wu She curious. Because he was curious so he looked at the book, resulting in the youthful and ignorant teenager developing a fantasy. He felt so guilty that he had accidentally led his junior brother astray. What a waste to be somebody’s brother!
Moreover, the most embarrassing and shameful thing was that he remembered that dream at that moment. Even, even the originally blurred face of the man in the dream, in a flash, coincided with the face of Fan Wu She. It was also because of this that he had fled in terror.
He couldn't help but wonder if he was really gay. Even if he was, he couldn't have an illicit thought about his own junior brother!
Xie Bi An pinched his thigh fiercely and chanted, "Ice cold for
a thousand years, all things especially quiet, the heart should be calm, look
at myself alone to awake, mind and spirit unite, qi should follow, alternate with
myself, not alarmed by changes, no idiocy, no anger, no desire, no demand, no
abandonment, no inaction, non-self*…”
Enduring until dawn, Xie Bi An had a plan for the time being. He had to first set Fan Wu She right, and not let his junior brother go further and further down the wrong path.
Then, when this matter has come to an end, he will return to the Underworld and see Meng Po. He wants to know why he is remembering his past life so often, and whether he had any unfinished regrets.
But who doesn't have any?
Hopefully, Meng Po would be able to answer his questions and, most
importantly, have a way to help him get rid of those fragmented memories.
At this moment, he listened to a sound from next door, which seemed
to be Zhong Kui's room.
Xie Bi An opened the door and saw that it was Yun Zhong Jun who had come to invite Zhong Kui. He was just about to ask a question when the doors to the rooms of Fan Wu She and Lan Chui Han, one to his left and one to his right, opened at the same time and they peeked out.
Xie Bi An's gaze was too late to dodge, and crashed right into Fan Wu
She's. His ears became hot and he resisted the urge to retreat to his bedroom.
Just hearing Zhong Kui said, "Immortal Lord is finally willing
to see me."
"Heaven Master, please."
"Master ..."
"You guys just wait here." Zhong Kui took two steps and
added, "Do not run around."
Although he looked at Xie Bi An when he spoke, several people knew
in their hearts to whom he was addressing.
"Wait." Lan Chui Han walked over, his face devoid of his
usual refined light smile, looking solemn and cold, "Brother Yun, as a
junior, my words carry little weight, and I know I am not qualified to ask for
an audience with Immortal Lord, but I have been entrusted by Immortal Alliance
Li’s mandate, hoping to resolve the conflict. If the Cangyu Sect delays in
handing over the two Flying Plume Ambassadors and the Seven Star Lamp, and does
not take a stand, then it would be failing Immortal Alliance Li’s hard work.
"
Yun Zhong Jun said in a deep voice, "Brother Lan, I already
said yesterday that it is not for me to make the decision on this matter.
Master's health is declining day by day and I have not yet had the time to
persuade her."
"Because of the demon foal Wuya, the heads of the major sects will probably come to Fenglin Continent personally, just in time to settle the accounts of Chunyang Sect. Is Brother Yun really not worried about the survival of the Cangyu Sect?”
Yun Zhong Jun's lips were tightly pursed and he did not speak.
"Take me along." Lan Chui Han clasped his hand behind his back and squared his shoulders. “I can't just sit here. Even if Immortal Lord refuses to see me later, I can still report back after carrying out my order, saying I have tried my best. In the future, if the Cangyu Sect is exposed to enemy attacks on all sides, I will be able to afford the friendship of forging the sword back then."
Yun Zhong Jun sighed, "Come with me."
After the three of them left, only Xie Bi An and Fan Wu She were
left.
Xie Bi An's heart thumped twice. He couldn't hide in his room, as it would undermine his dignified manner as a senior brother, but in this early morning, he still hadn't figured out how to teach Fan Wu She.
Fan Wu She said, "Brother, you haven't eaten your breakfast
yet, I'll go and bring it to you."
His demeanor and tone of voice were as normal, which made Xie Bi An breathe a sigh of relief: "Okay."
5 minutes later, Fan Wu She brought two breakfast meals to Xie Bi An's
room. Xie Bi An was leaning by the window, looking at Fengming Lake in the
distance, and the black aura of death on the shore of the lake.
"Are they just going to keep trapping Wuya like this?" Fan
Wu She gently placed the tray on the table, calculating in his mind how exactly
to snatch Wuya back.
"There's no way to decide what to do with Wuya now. After all, it was once the mount of the Supreme Demon. Moreover, the appearance of the demon foal here vaguely gives people the impression that there is some kind of conspiracy. The whole immortal cultivation world is silent out of fear and turn pale when talking about the Supreme Demon. Like what big brother Lan said, the Immortal Alliance will get the news in the next two days and will soon make a move." Xie Bi An's eyes were still on Wuya. The skeletal horse gave him a familiar feeling, as if they had met before, but that was not surprising. Every cultivator had seen Wuya's portrait. Some wild books and petty gossip that loved to get people's attention even painted it with three heads and six wings, like a living monster.
"Senior brother, come and eat."
Xie Bi An's figure paused and slowly turned around, pretending to sit down in a usual manner, pointing to a fish and saying, "I heard that this fish is only found in Kunlun. The meat is tender and sweet. When I leave, I must take some with me, and go back to give Bo Zhu and Official Lord Cui a taste."
Fan Wu She picked up his chopsticks and took a bite, "Mmm, it
tastes good, but if senior brother had made it, it would have tasted even
better." After saying this, he smiled at Xie Bi An, with a deep meaning in
his eyes.
Xie Bi An hurriedly lowered his head and ate to hide the momentary
panic in his heart.
Fan Wu She gave Xie Bi An another piece of asparagus.
"You eat your own, don't mind me."
Fan Wu She paused.
Just as Xie Bi An was somewhat remorseful whether he had spoken too harshly, Fan Wu She said, "Yesterday, senior brother said you will take care of me no matter what. So do I. I also want to take care of senior brother."
"..."
Fan Wu She looked at Xie Bi An without blinking, as if he couldn’t stop staring at something on his face.
"What are you looking at me for? Hurry up and eat." Xie Bi An said, ashamed and angry.
"Don't you know why I'm looking at you?" Fan Wu She smiled with hooked lips, his tone had a few teasing implications.
Xie Bi An slammed his chopsticks with a snap and stared back at Fan
Wu She in a pretend serious manner.
The smile climbed from the corners of Fan Wu She’s lips to the
corners of his eyes, and finally turned into a hooked, tangling and flirty one that
flowed from his gaze to Xie Bi An.
Xie Bi An thought Fan Wu She was just a seventeen-year-old boy who was not as experienced as himself. He shouldn't lose this battle of grandeur. He doesn't know that the Supreme Demon was living inside this young man that has frightened the immortal world for a hundred years. Not to mention the fact that he was no match for lust alone. He could not withstand one bold and seductive glance from Fan Wu She.
Xie Bi An hurriedly picked up his chopsticks: "The fish should
be getting cold, hurry up and eat."
But his wrist was gently clasped.
Fan Wu She's thumb pressed against the bump of Xie Bi An's wrist
bone, rubbing it intentionally or unintentionally, and whispered, "Senior
brother doesn't even dare to look at me anymore."
Xie Bi An shook off his hand, heaved down his chopsticks again, and
said seriously, "Wu She, let's talk."
"Okay."
Xie Bi An displayed the posture of an elder brother and said gently
but without losing any dignified manner, "Wu She, I know what's wrong with
you. It's senior brother's fault that I took an inexplicable book by mistake
and showed you something that you didn't understand before, so you couldn't tell
what is right or wrong, plus you're at a young age filled with vigour and
vitality, and there's no one of your age around you except senior brother, so
you've had some illusions."
He looked at Xie Bi An as he finished his analysis with a clear and logical manner, looking like he was trying to convince himself, and said with a smile, "You think I'm a three-year-old child?"
"You don’t understand."
"I don't understand?" Fan Wu She raised an eyebrow, "What do you think I don't understand?"
"You don't understand." Xie Bi An said with some difficulty, "Senior brother is a man. Wait until you meet a girl you like ..."
Fan Wu She smiled evilly: "I can't get hard with girls, but at night when I think of senior brother, my bottom swells up."
"You!" Xie Bi An almost jumped out of his chair. His junior brother was usually condescending and has a loose tongue, but he did not expect to hear such vulgar and bold words. The original thought of reasoning was all but lost in a flash.
"If I don't say it like this, you won't understand, right?"
Fan Wu She gazed deeply into Xie Bi An's eyes and said solemnly, "I like
you."
Xie Bi An was dumbfounded.
When he said these words, Fan Wu She was also frozen.
When he was still Zong Zi Xiao, he knew exactly what his endless
desire for Zong Zi Heng really stemmed from, except that all the possibilities
between them had been torn to pieces by hatred. He kept on possessing, he kept
on plundering, he was like a wild beast almost devouring his big brother completely
night after night, as if the only way to express the love he could not declare
was to enter over and over again, to mark over and over again.
He had never said "like" to Zong Zi Heng, not even once.
When he said "like", Fan Wu She's heart ached as if it had
been cut out by a knife a thousand times. In his past and present life, in his
hundred years of torture in hell, what he longed for most was to be able to say
"like" to the person he liked.
Fan Wu She grabbed Xie Bi An's hand, his gaze glittering and frighteningly bright: "Senior brother, be my cultivation partner. Be with me for the rest of your life, okay?"
Xie Bi An stood up and trembled, "Ridiculous, ridiculous!"
"How is this ridiculous? It's not uncommon for men to form a couple. There are several pairs in the Cangyu Sect."
"What are you thinking at such a young age?" Xie Bi An's
face was so red that it could have dripped blood, and even the thin skin at the
corners of his eyes was glistening with pink, as if he had been greatly
offended.
Fan Wu She said shamelessly, "I could have gotten married a long time ago. What's wrong with me thinking about all these? If I want to get a wife, I will only marry senior brother.”
Xie Bi An had never experienced such a scene before and was at a loss for words. This was much more troublesome compared to facing a bunch of evil spirits alone. His brain was feverish and chaotic, and his heartbeat was so loud that it hurt his head from shaking. He shook his head, still forcing himself to act calm: "You, you're just being nonsensical. I'm your senior brother."
Fan Wu She adjusted his emotions, and his face sank, making a hurt and vexed face, "Senior brother doesn't believe me? If you don't like me, you can say so. I will make you like me, but what rights do you have in not believing my sincerity? If you don't like me, then can you trample on my sincerity like this?" After saying that he turned his face away, his shoulders shaking slightly.
"I ... I'm not ..." Xie Bi An could not stand this the most. Seeing Fan Wu She’s sad and aggrieved look, his guilt-ridden heart suddenly rose. He could only feebly argue. "It’s not that Senior brother doesn’t believe you."
Fan Wu She did not say anything.
Xie Bi An sighed helplessly and seemed resigned to his fate:
"Then ... what do you like about senior brother?"
Only then did Fan Wu She turn his face. He looked at Xie Bi An. What came before his eyes was the can’t-do-anything-about-him doting look that Zong Zi Heng always showed. His eyes suddenly filled with deep emotion: "Senior brother treats me so well. Senior brother is also powerful, good looking and gentle. How can I not like senior brother?”
That naked gaze let Xie Bi An once again remembered last night's dream. If the man in the dream really had such a stunning face ...
Xie Bi An suddenly turned his face away in shame.
Yet Fan Wu She turned his face back. The black inky pupils were
unfathomable and hid a desire that was enough to devour the sky and the earth:
"Be my man."
PS: time to fall in love ♥ I'm under pressure at work now, so I will only upload 1 chapter per day, excluding weekends. Will resume my usual 2-3 chapters pace when I'm done with my intern presentation. (I just wanna get out of intern soon D: 10 more weeks to go...)
non self*[无我]--- Anattā https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anatt%C4%81 (the whole phrase XBA was chanting is a sutra: https://zhuanlan.zhihu.com/p/54590270 there’s no English translation for it
Edited on 8 Apr. 21 (Emzie)
←Previous Chapter Next Chapter→
He's so blunt I'm feeling flustered over here lol
ReplyDeleteAt this point I'm still not sure if I want them together
ReplyDeleteIf we only look at this life, I don't mind. But now that we know the past... he better grovel until we accept this brother-in-law
DeleteThe soft muddle headed, indecisive and easy to manipulate XBA is still not on par with stubborn,aggressive, arrogant straightforward FWS.. waiting for a development in character of XBA in this 2nd life and for ZZX/FWS redemption moments..
ReplyDeleteLOL🤣🤣🤣😍🤣🤣🤣zzx you're giving him soooo much info at once 🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteI'm waiting for XBA to discover the truth and make FWS work HARD for his love
ReplyDeleteThats gay
ReplyDeleteI really don't think XBA is gay... But I do believe FWS is going to bend him, ugh! Such is the story. Hmmm
ReplyDeletedid you forget bisexuality. but yeah let's dump everything on fan wushe yet again. these comments are really annoying.
DeleteShameless bastard. I hate ZZX so much. I hate him that my eyes are sweating!! I just want to see him suffer
ReplyDeletei relate.
Deletewhy the fuck are you reading this then 😭
Deletefor the nth time, you can't claim to like someone you've abused and feel no guilt whatsoever
ReplyDeletethats because theres a misunderstanding! this is why you should read with eyes!
DeleteYES
DeleteI'm getting confused by their age. I thought Wushe is only 14 or 15 here. Then suddenly it is 17 here lol
ReplyDeletelol same i did a whiplash sjsjsj
DeleteELES SAO TAO PERFEITOS
ReplyDeleteI am sorry but I can't do it. I hate zzx so much. I decided to drop novel because all I feel is frustration. Thank you translators for your hard work! You did incredible job ❤️ maybe some time later I will return and finish the novel, so I still will save the links 😘
ReplyDeleteWait he's 17, not 14? Oh ok I accept that FWS is a rizz master, I thought he was 14 hence why it felt strange.
ReplyDelete